About Us
Making Headlines...
and Then Just Making Stuff Up
About Us – The Real Doss Ferry Chronicle
Welcome to The Real Doss Ferry Chronicle, your go-to source for the most important, and sometimes completely made-up, news in North Jefferson County and now all of Alabama sometimes even nationwide. We’re a bunch of folks who got tired of waiting for the local paper to cover the real stories, like why the McDonald’s ice cream machine is always broken or who really stole the neighbor’s garden gnome (it’s probably Bobby, we all know it). We decided to take matters into our own hands and provide you with the kind of hard-hitting journalism that only a small town can produce.
When we’re not out reporting on the intense drama that unfolds over parking spaces at the Dollar General, we’re scouring the internet for the next big scoop—whether it’s a new restaurant that might or might not serve deep-fried everything, or a new law passed by the HOA that bans flamingos (again). We’re here to keep you entertained, informed, and occasionally confused in the best possible way. So grab a sweet tea, kick back, and get ready for the ride of your life—or at least the next five minutes of scrolling.
Staff
Editor-in-Chief
Samantha "Not a Bot" Roberts -
Samantha’s role is to make sure all articles are grammatically correct, which is a huge challenge considering half of the staff thinks "y’all" is a legitimate form of punctuation. She’s also the one who reminded us that “Google” exists.
Fact Checker
Debbie "The Local Historian" Harper –
Debbie ensures everything we say is technically true, even if it’s absurd. If you see a headline about a UFO landing in the Doss Ferry Walmart parking lot, you can trust that Debbie verified it by calling the Walmart manager. Twice.
Freelance Contributor
Earl "I’ve Got a Story" Stevens –
Earl writes the bulk of our offbeat stories, often while sitting in his recliner wearing an “I’m Not Arguing, I’m Explaining” T-shirt. His breaking news stories include "Why the Walmart Bathroom Smells Like Mystery Meat" and “The Great Doss Ferry Rock-Paper-Scissors Tournament: A Deep Dive.”